It is Friday, that is not the surprise, that it is the first Friday in August is. The summer is sliding by at an alarming rate, perhaps because on the ongoing issues with Covid, or due to my extra work hours, or even because I have been busy in general. Whatever the reason we, will want to savor these days and late evenings. I am trying to squeeze in so much this summer, day trips, hikes, DIY fixes, home improvement, website, classes, art, regular work, and so on. This has had the opposite effect of what I hoped, instead of feeling a fun filled sense of summer it has felt more like a constant choice between must do and want to do. I have plenty of time, just too much to fit in it!
Sometimes you just have to dive in and start swimming. It is only important that you can swim, not that you are an Olympic class athlete. If you wait until you suddenly wake up and have perfected a skill overnight you will be waiting your whole life. As I have been redirecting my creative life I have taken that to heart by making videos and retooling my website for this next phase. Full disclosure it did take me months to weigh my options and make the choice, I am not a person to rush right in to things. I also knew I had to fit anything I did in around work and home responsibilities.
My ultimate goal is to replace my workplace work with my online work. It is not an easy shift as I do enjoy my current job, and the fact that there is a steady paycheck plus benefits to count on. However, I need to look further down the road at the impact my working outside the home has on quality of life. I get to see people and interact, but my husband by default sees fewer people and gets out less. In weighing the options of having occasional companions for him vs. me being around more, it becomes a pretty clear choice.
It is nerve wracking, but I can juggle both while things get up to speed and profitability. But the timeline is fairly tight. I have been fortunate that my daughter has been home since being laid off and starting her online masters program. It has an end date though that I need to keep an eye on. I am pretty excited about this whole process, feeling less overwhelmed than I would have expected. There are moments of “What am I thinking!?” but over all progress is occurring at a steady pace.
In order to get to the other side of things there needs to be a way. Wading, flying or swimming are options, though when there is a troll free bridge that is probably the way to go. Each day I am making another set of steps to get across the bridge. I am having to get comfortable filming myself for tutorials, learning editing, brainstorming ideas, and the myriad of other tasks that I need to get done in order to step off the bridge on the other side ready to go.
This month has moved with the same treadmill predictability as the previous 8. Moving along, yet seemingly with little to notice in the passing. Now that the lengthy rewiring of the house is 95% done I can at least use my art space and try to get some pieces made. It is a nice haven for me to take a break from sameness of the days. I
don’t get out as often as I should into nature, and I am feeling the effects of that. I need to upend my regular approach of chores first, fun later in order to do that. Not an easy switch up as I like to get after the to do list vs seeing it still undone in the afternoon as the light wanes. It just feels like more effort than I can muster right now. So I need to force myself to do it so I can enjoy the benefit of seeing new sights, getting fresh air and feeling my body move.
No easy task sometimes. There can be too much clamoring for attention, resolution and direction. Usually just when you think you have a handle on it, something else goes awry. It’s all a matter of timing and action I guess. Trying to figure out what needs to go first and how to handle it as efficiently as possible.
Often too many options are as troublesome as too few. I can be good to have a way to winnow out the extraneous items so the decision making can be done in a timely and focused manner. It often feels as if life has become a cereal aisle; bran, corn, rice, wheat, oat, toasted, sugared, honey, cinnamon, flakes, puffs, rings, fruit, on all the possible combinations that can be made from them. It can be too much without a way to set aside some of them from consideration. A myriad of possibilities can just distract from the main goal and slow down the progress underway. I need to winnow on many fronts so I can focus on what needs attention, and not get lost down the rabbit hole of possibilities.