Today I didn’t have a new lunchbox, pencil-case or textbook. I didn’t have a note pinned to my sweater with my bus number or teacher’s name. But it was still my first day back in a classroom as a student. Any of you who have been out of the classroom for a long time know what it is like to go back. You feel excited at first, which then starts to turn to doubt and possibly veers off into a bit of panic as you are handed a syllabus, supply sheet, expectations and assignments. In your head you wonder what sort of madness overtook you that landed you here.
That was me today. Feeling not like a deer in the headlights, but like a possum, and lacking the ability to bound out of sight. Playing dead seemed like an option though.
Once you have been out of school for a while it is totally out of the comfort zone to be back in it regardless of the course you choose. That is normal I guess, but would have liked to be exempt from that feeling. I didn’t expect to feel so jittery, but I did. I hope once I get into the flow of assignments and the class I will feel calmer. But for right now it feels more like a “YIKES!”