In the Nursing Home
She is like a horse grazing
a hill pasture that someone makes
smaller by coming every night
to pull the fences in and in.
She has stopped running wide loops,
stopped even the tight circles
She drops her head to feed; grass
is dust, and the creekbed’s dry.
Master, come with your light
halter. Come and bring her in.
Recently I have been noticing that my days are falling into a sort of no man’s land, neither full and productive nor stagnant and aimless. It is as if I am moving slowly as if time were not of the essence. I am trying out new techniques for the fun of it to see the results. Some things have stalled and are hard to reawaken. Maybe it is end of change of season sluggishness, or lack of a plan. Either way I need to shake it off and not let it get a toehold on my days. I find when I am out and about with my camera my images are taking on an abstract or contemplative quality instead, which puzzles me as I am not sure why that is so at this particular point in time. I am like a cat pausing mid stride by something that has caught its attention. And while that is okay, it is also too easy for it to become a distraction that stops all progress, and I don’t want that to happen. Creativity can too quickly become submerged beneath things that seem on the surface to be noteworthy and end up being timewasters.
My friend and I are looking to return to the workplace after years here and there. It is no easy task as anyone who is jobhuntin knows. The classifieds are full of job acronyms that mean nothing to either of us, or jobs that are way off the mark. Skills that were vital for the last job are now either outdated or replaced by technology. We are enjoying our get together time though, brainstorming and passing on information, trying to piece together the job market and where we might fit into it. It challenges us in unexpected ways as the old methods of job hunting have shifted in the current times, it also can make you feel as if you have missed the bus and it’ll be a long wait until the next one. Where we worked together years before has since closed up, not from competition but a sign of shifting markets. It will all work out in unexpected ways, just as it did when we both ended up at the same place so by chance.
Not every attempt goes as smoothly as envisioned. Things go awry, schedules change, results are deplorable, it happens. That is when perseverance comes into play. The ability to redirect, reflect on and redo to see if a better result will come about. I think this statue has the look of perseverance to it. There is a glint in her eye, a set to her jaw and a squaring of the shoulders that seems to imply she is preparing to tackle a problem, and is hoping for a better outcome. There is a real strength that emanates from her regardless of the angle you view her from, and for me it is as if she is able to impart that determination to the viewer, to not give up. Don’t we all need a bit of encouragement from time to time to let us know we are not off in left field, that this too will pass? I know I do. Sometimes even getting a blog entry pulled together can seem daunting, nothing seems to be quite the right fit. Some days every photo I take is lackluster, every creative attempt feels flat, there is a clunkiness to every move. The Blahs. When nothing seems to have that spark, and time seems to dribble away unproductively. It feels like it is going to be the normal way of things, yet eventually it passes. I guess that is where the idea of “keep on keeping on” comes into play, and I am off to do just that, once I eat lunch.
*This is a ; & a ) blog entry.
I first saw this about a month or so ago, didn’t have my camera and it was gone the next time I passed by. But, lo and behold it was back again last Friday and I did have my camera! It cracks me up and I hope it will make you smile too.
Now I understand security is important. It seems to me, however, that this tower doesn’t exude security. I am pretty sure I can breach the barriers and tow the whole thing away, possibly with a mini cooper! There is a stork like quality to the spindly legs supporting the structure, the barriers are low enough that it looks like it could step over them and go on its way. Humans are so funny! I am not sure if someone is in the tower for their shift, having been cranked slowly into the sky by a co-worker, or if there is a camera that surveys the parking lot and sends the images into a monitoring station. Possibly it is a decoy to make people think they are being watched. If it is a decoy will migrating security towers stop here for a rest, fooled by the decoy? That would be quite a sight, a whole parking lot of towers milling about or resting. How much habitat space does a flock of security towers need anyhow? I think they could become an invasive species and a nuisance, possibly and aggressive one. Maybe this one is being readied for release back into its natural habitat after being injured. Of course now that it has imprinted a human face as a caregiver I expect it will start to follow people around looking for attention and food. For now it looks like some strange exhibit in the asphalt zoo of the shopping mall. If more enclosures pop up I will let you know!
I mentioned back in Quietude that I was cardinal free due to the call from Rome. Now the conclave is over and on Saturday I looked out my window to see that my cardinal was back. I grabbed my camera to get a quick picture before he headed home to sleep, long flight, jet lag and all.
The chickadees, nuthatches and tufted titmouse were delighted and all flocked to say hello and share a communal meal with a side of conversation. I think it is funny that he was nowhere to be seen during the conclave, the food was there. Obviously I know little about the secret life of cardinals. Now that we are looking at another storm of heavy wet snow I expect to see many feathered friends at the feeder, and some furry ones who hog all the seed. I find my feeder to be a place for me to meditate while watching, we often call it bird tv. My thoughts move in different patterns, reaching new conclusions as I watch the activity. Watching birds is not unlike watching a cat sleep, both have a soothing quality, an acceptance that there is little to worry about. I need to take away that lesson and not let things beyond my control take root in my mind. No easy feat I know, but keeping the intent in my mind and focusing on the fact that “all this shall pass” helps.
“All shall be well, and all shall be well and all manner of thing shall be well.” Julian of Norwich